Getting Back on Track
Tuesday, April 14, 2009 at 07:50AM 
I have read several blog posts recently by parents talking about how sometimes they get off track and their routine starts to drift. (If this doesn’t happen to you, please don’t comment — we don’t want to know!)
How do you get back on track?
When this happens to me, I break the routine, clear away the clutter, and pull my attention back.
Breaking the routine seems key to stopping my inertia slide. We do something really different for a day or two. This usually reenergizes all of us as well. It’s like throwing the windows open and letting the breeze in.
I am always surprised by just how much my attention (or lack of attention) affects what is happening with our days. I set the tone. When I pull my attention back to what is important, their attention follows.
I clear away the clutter from the studio (it does tend to accumulate) and that’s all it takes. No new art materials, no interesting provocation — just a clean table and a clean easel and re-sorted supplies, and they are suddenly drawing and painting and building.
I put my finger on a (dusty) half-completed model that was hidden behind a spilling-over bag of new recyclables and suddenly the maker is deeply involved in finishing it.
I put my finger on a map inside my other son’s project journal and suddenly he remembers he wanted to remake it on giant paper and paint it.
I crack open my own project journal and start reading back, and I remember where I dropped the threads of what we were doing and start picking them back up again.
My attention has gravitational pull.
I set the tone.
Reader Comments (30)
Arhhhh. this I need to remember in my days, thank you.
Yes, now I think about it - the days when I am low and lack-lustre, so are the kids.
I did a big kid-room tidy and rearrange today - I love the way they start playing new games with the previously hidden away half-forgotten pieces.
Tomorrow I will set a good tone, for myself and for them.
yes, it’s so funny how tidying their toys or supplies and setting them neatly on a clean shelf makes them so irresistible. things they haven’t looked at in months are suddenly pulled out and used.
i also notice that as they work (and produce clutter), the free space to work in gets smaller and smaller and smaller — and so does their work. soon they are just drawing on a single sheet of paper on the last clear spot in the studio, then *poof* that spot is filled, too, and they’re not working at all! when i clean off the tables, not only do they start working again, but they are working on much larger projects.
I'm also trying to steer her into more visual representation of her work, so the visual reminders trigger more work. She's such a reader, that she'll forget to take the time to do the hands on work that is a more tangible expression of what she's learned. I think having the visual stimulus will help keep her moving forward.
interesting, too, re: visual representations — not only are they manifestations of things that have been learned, they can also be a way of learning. children can really work out their ideas about something with their hands. it can really engage a different part of their brain.
pre-building/modeling, children can have a pretty vague idea about how something works (say, a Mars rover or a bread-kneading machine); afterward, they really understand how the components work and fit together and they’re able to articulate clearly what they know.
not just with machines or 3D representations, either — detailed maps, a model of a medieval village .. they take the knowledge they’ve gathered and put it to use, bending it this way and that, and really examining it along the way. it also tends to produce questions, which keep driving the whole project.
How to get back on track? Good question! I think a break in the routine by going to a playground or a museum or on a hike all help. Clears the air and refreshes both the body and the soul. And yes, certainly cleaning up the clutter helps too!
My older children are gone for the week to camp so today the younger ones and I went to a museum to find out more about dinosaurs. My four year old wanted to ask questions to the museum docents but no one was around - we looked at the dinosaur exhibit and read a little of what was on the plaques. The size of the dinosaurs is what struck him the most; ones are larger than he and there are some that are smaller than him. He thought that was cool. The toes or claws on the feet also were interesting to him. Now I get to figure out how to take that information and bring it back home.... I think we'll make tracks of our own with paint and a long piece of paper. Tomorrow is supposed to be nice once again. Love this blog, it inspires me!
theresa — family metabolism! perfect!
cathy, did you have your sketching stuff with you at the museum? ;^)
and thank you! i really appreciate that. :^)
i lurk here daily, and really appreciate the inspiration and the conversation that takes place in this space. thank you!
Thanks!
PS My blog is at www.stoneagetechie.blogspot.com, for some reason url bar rejected it as being invalid.
"I set the tone." I try to remember that, especially when I don't like the tone in my home. Some good friends and I were discussing this around Xmas---how we have to consciously create joy in our families because nothing influences the mood in our homes as much as our own moods.
And clear space---how true that is for any artist. You need space---mentally and physically---in order to create. We just moved our dining room table into storage in the basement in order to set up more space. And I'm finding I have to be fiercely protective of any "white space" in our home because it will immediately become filled or piled on.
I find myself sneaking boxes to good will...my son is as much a pack-rat as I am. If he sees me box anything, he'll lift it up and say "This would be perfect for..." or "I was planning to use this to make..."
And he would...but there is too much. Are your boys any better at letting go of their own stuff, and any suggestions on this?
Thanks!
Shannon
So tomorrow I am going to get on that clean up!!
"I set the tone"... so very. very true!
Thanks once again Lori!
As to having Mom do something productive, my kids are responding really positively to watching me work on my thesis. They enjoy talking about it with me, and they like to work alongside me. I love that they have the opportunity to see me do something that is meaningful to me.
and in my opinion something you can never be reminded of enough.
when I find "the crazies" getting out of control with the kids I can usually find a direct link to my own "crazy" being pretty high. I always find it an amazing reminder how important it is to keep myself on track for their own good.
So happy to know I am not the only one that sometimes needs to regroup.
thanks for a very helpful and inspiring blog
hi jan! ;^) it’s the same in the classroom, as we know!
hi, karen. gah. we need to paint our deck railings. but this spring is so soggy and cold! your url actually has no “www” — it’s http://stoneagetechnie.blogspot.com. :^)
deirdre, my only suggestion is to work fast and use dark green garbage bags! the only way i get anything to goodwill is if no one sees what i’m doing!
i can’t keep things cleared out, but i have accepted that it is a cycle — we start off with nice blank space, the boys are energized and inspired to fill it, then .. that’s when i have to remember to clear it out again! i’m better now about recognizing that things have stalled and we need a clean sweep. it’s tricky, though, when they’re still into the things they’ve made. i’ve been making use of shelves more, to keep things out and on display but still have space to keep creating.
thank you, shannon!
i need to, too, dawn, but this weather is just not motivating me. ;^) i’m afraid today the only tone i’m setting is rain + reading + popcorn!
kerry, my boys make LEGO stop-motion films, too, and talk about clutter .. there is nothing like a huge movie scene that was left in the middle (you can’t MOVE ANYTHING, mom!!), not to mention the piles of weird packaging we collect to use as backgrounds. :^) i am constantly trying to “fix” their LEGO area so i can shift things around to make new blank spots — it’s the only thing that keeps them moving!
i feel the same way about sharing my work with the boys. it is truly a gift to be able to work at home alongside your children while they are doing their own work.
thank you, maria!
Usually it begins with a cleaning or sorting of some sort.
Because when I'm not enthusiastic about something...the kids aren't either.